by jeffrey wade greer
just got out of college
two short weeks ago
and come tomorrow mornin'
i'll shake hands with your ceo
oh, and just like the tailor
of the emperor's new clothes
i will sell you nothin'
and make you happy you bought it
i'm a big six consultant
i'm a big six consultant
i'm a big six consultant
and i'm worth every dime
well, i wear a charcoal suit now
my hair's cut high and tight
because lookin' professional
means more than bein' right
and when it comes to politics
i kiss up when i can
it's the only way to get ahead
when you're workin' for the man
and i am as a big six consultant
i'm a big six consultant
i'm a big six consultant
and i'm worth every dime
well, it's kinda like i'm an actor
i've learned to play a part
i repeat what i've heard usin' bigger words
so you will think i'm smart
i've got a powerpoint presentation
with the answers that you seek
it tells you the same old swill you already knew
but now it's in consultant speak
'cuz i'm a big six consultant
i'm a big six consultant
i'm a big six consultant
and i'm worth every dime
well, it all seems kinda funny
i have to wonder why
the words that i say are taken as gospel
when i'm in my coat and tie
because i just got out of college
two short weeks ago
and come tomorrow mornin'
i'll shake hands with your ceo-oh-oh
and just like the tailor
of the emperor's new clothes
i will sell you nothin'
and make you oh so happy you bought it
'cuz i'm a big six consultant
i'm a big six consultant
i'm a big six consultant
and i'm worth every dime
oh, yeah, i said i'm worth every dime
by jeffrey wade greer
the very first time i saw you
you were in your underwear
i walked into the bathroom
and i saw you standin' there
i stammered oh i'm sorry
i'm an idiot goodbye
when i walked back to the party
you were the apple of my eye
and when you'd gotten ready
and you walked into the room
i tried to keep my steady
while inhaling your perfume
i said it's nice to meet you
you looked at me and grinned
you said it's nice to meet you too
now that you can't see my rear end
i said i'm sorry 'bout that
it was my mistake
i didn't mean to peek at
what you're about to shake
and so we started dancing
and we began to sing along
our romance was advancing
to a classic devo song
i hope you know i love you
i hope you know i care
i hope next time i see you
you are in your underwear
by jeffrey wade greer
i came home late last night smellin' of gin
my woman looked at me and she saw me grin
she said, why's this disease so common in men?
i'll never stay up worried about you again
so yippie-ki-yi-yea give me another beer
for you know that my woman's thrown me out of our home
yippie-ki-yi-yea give me another beer
gonna sit on this barstool where i'm not alone
i woke this mornin' with pain in my head
just thinkin' 'bout things that i should have said
i waited too long before my heart bled
it was go to the tavern or go back to bed
so yippie-ki-yi-yea give me another beer
for you know that my woman's thrown me out of our home
yippie-ki-yi-yea give me another beer
gonna sit on this barstool where i'm not alone
now i'm back with my buddies at our local bar
not worried 'bout drivin' 'cuz she took my car
no doubt in my mind that we're gonna go far
just sittin' here lyin' 'bout how lucky we are
and yippie-ki-yi-yea give me another beer
for you know that my woman's thrown me out of our home
yippie-ki-yi-yea give me another beer
gonna sit on this barstool where i'm not alone
by jeffrey wade greer (title from songfight.org)
why is it that the best bands play at a hole in the wall?
why is it that the best bands make no money at all?
if you wanna hear the best bands, you'll have to go to the show
you will never hear the best bands on commercial radio
happy machine ankle, you're my favorite band
happy machine ankle, i'm your biggest fan
well they practice in the basement next to the incinerator
they got their band name from an online band name generator
and like all of the best bands, they play extremely well
they post their songs on songfight, where they get torn all to hell
happy machine ankle, you're my favorite band
happy machine ankle, i'm your biggest fan
why is it that the best bands play at a hole in the wall?
why is it that the best bands make no money at all?
if you wanna hear the best bands, you'll have to go to the show
you will never hear the best bands on commercial radio
happy machine ankle, i'm your biggest fan
happy machine ankle, you're my favorite band
by jeffrey wade greer
there was a time you loved me, babe
i know it's true
a time your sweet lips whispered
i love you
so i'll be all right
because i know
there was a time
all my hopes and dreams
left with you
my whole life is gone away
and i'm so blue
and people tell me, babe
that it's not right
to cry myself to sleep
night after night
but i tell 'em i'll be all right
because i know
there was a time
and if i knew then
what i know now
i wouldn't change anything
anyhow
it was only a moment
but the moment serves
a moment of more love
than any man deserves
so i'll, i'll be all right
because i know
there was a time
no sense gettin' angry
no sense in gettin' mad
i'll never have again
what i once had
you won't ever come back to me
this i know
and i will get through it, babe
but the healin's slow
but i'll be all right
because i know
there was a time
a time you loved me, babe
i know it's true
a time your sweet lips whispered
i love you
so i'll, i'll be all right
because i know
there was a time
there was a time
by jeffrey wade greer
i go to sleep now in your bed
i heard the secrets that he said
i know that there will come a day
when all the hatred falls away
he's walking down the road
now everybody knows he said
he's taking off his clothes
now everybody knows he said
the soul he saw in your brown eyes
forced the man to realize
his search for truth had just begun
he would have more days in the sun
he's walking down the road
now everybody knows he said
he's taking off his clothes
now everybody knows he said
and although we can never see
what it truly means to be
we make our ways the best we can
with partial pictures, gun in hand
he's walking down the road
now everybody knows he said
he's taking off his clothes
now everybody knows he said
he said that life was just a game
he took a step into the flame
and though the fire made him yearn
he turned his head and watched it burn
he's walking down the road
now everybody knows he said
he's taking off his clothes
now everybody knows he said
and while the words we say are nice
at their best, they're imprecise
and if i hold on to your hand
it's just to help me understand
he's walking down the road
now everybody knows he said
why can't you let me be?
why do you look at me? he said
by jeffrey wade greer
austin ain't no place for a cowboy
'least that's the way it seems to me
there's hippies everywhere, and folks with purple hair
it's my first day here, i already wanna leave
austin is a rough place for a cowboy
that's how i feel on this, my second day
i just don't belong, although this band keeps playin' my favorite songs
but sooner or later, i'm gonna have to get away
austin's an ok place for a cowboy
i've been here for three days in a row
there's lots of pretty girls, and the music here is the best in the world
and now i'm not in such a big hurry to go
austin is a fine place for a cowboy
four days here, it already feels like home
guitars, beers, and smokes, and occasional late-night tokes
and this cowboy no longer wants to roam
by jeffrey wade greer
when the wind lie down
it gonna lie down in the afternoon
and when the wind lie down
we're gonna lie down, too
when the wind lie down
it gonna lie down and kiss the clouds above
when the wind lie down
we're gonna fall in love
'cuz i was meant for you
and you were meant for me, too
when the sun go down
it gonna go down in the afternoon
and when the sun go down
we're gonna go down, too
and when the sun go down
it gonna go down and kiss the ground below
and when the sun go down
you're gonna know
that i was meant for you
and you were meant for me, too
when the moon come up
it gonna come up in the afternoon
and when the moon come up
we're gonna get up, too
and when the moon come up
it gonna come up and kiss the stars hello
and when the moon come up
it's gonna glow
'cuz i was meant for you
and you were meant for me, too
by jeffrey wade greer
well, i was sittin' there in the office today
and the phone wasn't ringin', so i started to play
i thought about the trot line that i'd baited with perch
i found a new guide service on a yahoo! search
well, any common man'll surely understand
the things i hold so dear
i like huntin', and i like fishin',
and i like drinkin' beer
well, it's 2 p.m. and i may leave soon
they say the game likes to move when you've got a full moon
i'll fish for a while, and if things get slow
i'll kill a whitetail deer with my compound bow
i'm sick and tired, and i might get fired,
but you know that i have no fear
'cuz i like huntin', and i like fishin',
and i like drinkin' beer
well, i know just where i'm fixin' to go
out in that old red dirt where the yaupons grow
there's a gun and a rod in the back of my truck
and the cooler's full enough to get me all fu'd up
if i thought i could, well ya know i would
do this all damn year
'cuz i like huntin', and i like fishin',
and i like drinkin' beer
well the deer and hogs and the specs and reds
and the ducks and geese and the dove
and the bass and cats and the cold twelve packs
are just a few of the things that i love
well, ya can't blame me; it's in my genes
'cuz my last name is greer
so i like huntin', and i like fishin',
and i like drinkin' beer
i said i like huntin', and i like fishin',
and i like drinkin' beer
there ain't nothin' better than huntin' and fishin'
and drinkin' ice cold beer
by jeffrey wade greer
(whoah-oh, hey-ya, hey-ya)
she knows you're out to use her
she won't let you abuse her
she's learned that you're a loser
she's out the door
right!
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
(right!)
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
she did not try to win you
you were just on the menu
pass go, don't stop, continue
your time is up
right!
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
(right!)
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
she threw a signal, but you didn't catch it
she made a move, but you didn't match it
she wants to bury the hatchet
between your eyes
right!
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
(right!)
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
you think you want to marry
she thinks you're stinky and hairy
you've made her become wary
of men like you
right!
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
(right!)
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
she knows you're out to use her
she won't let you abuse her
she's learned that you're a loser
she's out the door
right!
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
(right!)
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
she did not try to win you
you were just on the menu
pass go, don't stop, continue
your time is up
right!
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
(right!)
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
she threw a signal, but you didn't catch it
she made a move, but you didn't match it
she wants to bury the hatchet
between your eyes
right!
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
(right!)
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
you think you want to marry
she thinks you're stinky and hairy
you've made her become wary
of men like you
right!
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
(right!)
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
right!
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
(right!)
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
(right!)
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
(right!)
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
(right!)
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
(right!)
she's got it!
she's got it all packed up!
by jeffrey wade greer
well, i've been called a dangerous man
i had a girl on my arm and drink in my hand
and the more i live, the more i know it's true
it's crazy when you think about what i've done
i'm a beer drinkin', hard drivin' son of a gun
just a-livin' my life to do what i wanna do
it's fair to say that i've been around
i've chased them women all over this town
drinkin' booze and smokin' cigarettes
well, i eat like hell and i can't drive
it's a wonder that i'm still alive
and even more of a wonder that i still have no regrets
so i thank God for what i've got
i never woulda made it if He hadn't helped out a lot
i thank God for what i've got
even though i don't know if i'll make it to Heaven or not
and i never did quite fit in
i guess bein' myself is my biggest sin
and i can't be accused of livin' right
i was peein' in the parkin' lot when i ran into a west u. cop
at the marquis ii on a thursday night
and one night i stayed out too late
i think i was tryin' to get me a date
with the rumple minze girl at the timber wolf pub
when i woke up, i was good and sore
i ain't gonna drink rumple minze no more
'cuz you don't get a good night's sleep in the dang bathtub
so i thank God for what i've got
i never woulda made it if He hadn't helped out a lot
i thank God for what i've got
even though i don't know if i'll make it to Heaven or not
i live my life like rollin' dice
just hangin' with my friends from terry and rice
and a few more that i picked up along the way
and i'm too dumb to admit defeat
and my friends end up with all the women i meet
but they buy me beer, so i guess that that's ok
and i don't like to wear a suit and tie
and if i did it every day, i'd prob'ly die
i wear jeans and a tee shirt every time i can
well, you prob'ly couldn't tell it, but i love my life
and i own four guns and i carry a knife
and i've never had to use 'em against another man
so i thank God for what i've got
i never woulda made it if He hadn't helped out a lot
i thank God for what i've got
even though i don't know if i'll make it to Heaven or not
by jeffrey wade greer
i see you standin' there
with pigtails in your hair
i know that you're the one for me
blue all stars on your feet
sun dress look oh so sweet
you make me feel so irie
but i can't bring myself to say it
so i won't
when you held my hand that day
my troubles ran away
i didn't want your touch to ever end
you've got the best smile in the world
you're everybody's fantasy girl
i want to be more than your friend
but i can't bring myself to say it
so i won't
when you needed somebody to care
i said i'd always be there
i want to be there for all time
i held you while you cried
i think i almost died
oh how i wish that you were mine
but i can't bring myself to say it
so i won't
but i can't bring myself to say it
so i won't
and now you've found someone
you two have so much fun
i wish that i was in his shoes
he holds you while i cry
and it's no wonder why
you've got me singin' the blues
'cuz i can't bring myself to say it
so i won't
by jeffrey wade greer
in my wild and younger days, i did a lot of crazy things
runnin' 'round like a young buck with no brain
and i know that you love me, but you're not sure you can trust me
because the things i did back then seem so insane
now, i've told you the truth about the adventures of my youth
and you're tryin' to decide whether you should stay the night
i see your hesitation at my simple explanation
but all i can say is young bucks like to fight
young bucks like to fight; they like to stay out all night
they like to test themselves to see if they'll come out all right
so i offer no excuses for my sins and my abuses
all i can say is young bucks like to fight
i hope you understand i'm just an ordinary man
and i've finally figured out that all i want is you
i know that it sounds trite, but what i'm tellin' you is right
y'know things become cliche because they're true
and it's true that
young bucks like to fight; they like to stay out all night
they like to test themselves to see if they'll come out all right
so i offer no excuses for my sins and my abuses
all i can say is young bucks like to fight
young bucks like to fight; they like to stay out all night
they like to test themselves to see if they'll come out all right
so i offer no excuses for my sins and my abuses
all i can say is young bucks like to fight
that's all i can say is young bucks like to fight
by jeffrey wade greer and richard edward zigler
who let your memory in this bar?
i promised myself the day you left i wasn't gonna fall apart
i was doin' fine; i didn't have a broken heart
until someone let your memory in this bar
who made the sunshine go away?
i did all i knew to try to make you stay
i knew when you walked out that there was nothin' more to say
because someone made the sunshine go away
who stole the sparkle from my eyes?
i look in the mirror and see a face that i don't recognize
i was happy once, but now i'm only wise
since someone stole the sparkle from my eyes
who let your memory in this bar?
i promised myself the day you left i wasn't gonna fall apart
and i was doin' fine; i didn't have a broken heart
until someone let your memory in this bar
until someone let your memory in this bar
(p) 2004 Jeffrey Wade Greer. All songs copyright (c) 2004 Jeffrey Wade Greer except "Who Let Your Memory In This Bar?" copyright (c) 2004 Jeffrey Wade Greer and Richard Edward Zigler.
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